sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
Every concussion has its silver lining
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
