i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Randomize