that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
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