Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
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