It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Randomize