Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
