My roommate and I had a nyquil contest. The nyquil won.
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
Randomize
