lets start a swedish sibling band together
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
i need some magic done to my vagina
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
Randomize
