my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
Randomize
