Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
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You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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