so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Randomize
