I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
Randomize
