He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
Randomize
