Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Randomize
