the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
Randomize