I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
So vagazzling was a success
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
Randomize
