yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
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