Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
I just added a bunch of arbitrary options to my ouija board. Ghosts can now tell me "cheddar," "the homosexual agenda," "the whole foods vegan aisle," or "viable offspring"
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
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