I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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