you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
