So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Randomize
