Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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