i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
True college students do jello shots in the library
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