so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize