You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
Dude I'm at a bar, and there's this Elvis impersonator here that I went to rehab with. Apparently Elvis has left the wagon.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Randomize
