Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Randomize
