I swear she didn't look like that last week.
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
Randomize
