I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
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