i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
i think my cat just said my name.
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
