Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
Randomize