Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
Randomize
