you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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