you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
Blow job season was short but glorious.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Randomize
