trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
Randomize
