Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
Randomize
