I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
Randomize