At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
Randomize
