...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
We got so high we made milksteak
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
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