I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
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