Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
Randomize