it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
Randomize
