No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
