Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
