I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
Randomize