...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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