she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize
