I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
