FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
There was a time I was reining queen of Sunday funday... And at that same time I also weighed 20 pounds more, had the morale of a spearmint rhino stripper, and woke up most mornings asking more questions than fucking Barbara Walters. I think I just wrote my own epitaph.
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
ok first of all what the fuck
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize