dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
Randomize