i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
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