i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
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