My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
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